I Never Could Get the Hang of Wednesdays, aka, The P.O.D. Towel Day Dilemma

Ugh, argh and WTF?

For three months I’ve been researching, investigating, analyzing, adapting, updating and uploading for the sole purpose of having some of my art & design stuff available for print-on-demand merchandise. This is nothing new for me; back in the day I was involved with a relatively successful CafePress adventure, but to indulge my inner old man (who I shall call “Bill” in honor of my gruff-but-lovable, maternal PapPap), POD was a different animal in the wayback of seven years ago!

To simplify my rant (and focus on self-promotion) I’ll lead off with the mostly harmless, little graphic I’ve been most excited about sharing recently – sharing specifically on towels. It’s time-sensitive and also a nod to the days when I enjoyed reading novels for the sake of them being enjoyable and not as desperate escapism from the world in which we live. (Would another “Ugh, argh and WTF?” seem redundant even if it’s topically relevant again?)

Here it is now:
Hitchhiker's Guide Hoopy Frood Supply Co. by WIPjenni
You might not know this, but International Towel Day is May 25. It was started shortly after Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (et al) author, Douglas Adams passed on. You also might not know that 42 days until May 25 happens to be Thursday, April 13. You also, also might not know I’m writing this on Wednesday, April 12.

If hoopy froods, towels, 42 and Thursdays have no pop cultural meaning to you, I strongly recommend that you read the Hitchhiker’s Guide Trilogy. (The actual trilogy, not the four-book trilogy that includes So Long and Thanks for All the Fish. It’s quite probably the most disappointing fourth book in a trilogy, ever. And if you do read it, definitely don’t read Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency, also by Mr. Adams. And if you do read it, don’t come crying to me when you can no longer appreciate a loquacious string of superfluous adjectives without breaking into a nervous sweat.)

This is the encapsulated dilemma portion of events… Redbubble has a nice face and a pretty sweet backend: NO TOWELS BUT ALL SORTS OF OTHER PRODUCTS. Society6‘s UI is like a first gen NES that’s been under a box of worn out Converse All Stars since 1985 – and still is: ONLY WHITE TOWELS IN SEVERAL SIZES AND SOME OTHER PRODUCTS. Zazzle abandoned their ‘community-centric’ business model years ago,and I have now abandoned them.

So. I have random merchandise available through random services even though I have dedicated an embarrassing amount of time to finding an online print on demand shop that offers good quality products, responsive customer support, reasonable prices, fair artist royalties, and a broad enough selection of merchandise to satisfy my somewhat bizarre notions of what items particular art stuffs should be printed on. I know. A girl asks too much.

I have abundantly failed in streamlining my process, but, I have achieved a modicum of success in making my creative content accessible in forms that you may appreciate. I would appreciate your buying something. May I suggest a towel?

If you enjoy my (humorous!/enlightening?!?) ramblings, please subscribe to this blog to get email updates; follow me on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter – comment with #wipjenni. Tell your friends and family – and if you really want to encourage me, buy a shirt or some other WIPjenni art merchandise. I love you all!

Time to Make the Donuts!

It was a loooooooooooong weekend and not in that “I just threw some things in my overnight and we had a spontaneous, romantic, three-day getaway! *giggle*” way. More like the spending way too much time looking for pretty distractions on Instagram while dealing with the most irritating tech issues ever and waiting for my man to get done with his 20 hours of unpaid overtime, way.

However, I learned tings; many, many tings.

  • A.) 45 is still popping Planter’s and the US (and world) may be in even more danger than a few days ago. (I know, still hard to fathom, but still true.)
  • B.) It is possible to fall out of love with one’s Samsung S7 immediately upon installing Android 7. (They call it Nougat, but there ain’t nothin’ sweet about it – although it is sticking in my craw!)
  • C.) A phone, tablet and laptop can all act unexpectedly screwy, for no apparent reason, on the same day, and then be A-OK for the same non-reasons on the next day.
  • D.) I buy button batteries, dog wipes and light bulbs with Amazon Prime when I’m bored.
  • E.) GIMP is *almost* really honking good.
  • F.) It is now apparently the universal civic duty of females the world over to idolize donuts and spend vast sums of money on bullet journaling supplies while performing some sort of unspoken tribute to the 1970s by surrounding themselves with “air plants” and going to macrame workshops. It’s weird. I was a kid in the 70s and I have to say that (other than rock ‘n’ roll and sitcoms about ‘real’ people; e.g. folks who weren’t blindingly white, suburban, and suspiciously calm,) air plants, donuts and macrame were some of the better things in that decade, so there’s that. But still, it’s weird. Trust me.

Another thing that’s weird is a crown-wearing cartoon donut mounted on a cupcake to assert its dominance as Princess of Pastries. But hey, it has chocolaty brush lettering floating over its ‘head’ and a really thin (call it a crumb-coat) snippet of food porn innuendo, so it’s all good. Really, look at it, you just might agree!

So, yes indeed, the fruits of my weekend amount to un-fruit-like snacks on t-shirts. Oh, but I did learn one more ting:

  • G.) After an unproductive, flat weekend, Mondays seem kind of cool. :)
  • BONUS: “Time To Make The Donuts” Dunkin’ Donuts commercial! https://youtu.be/petqFm94osQ
    BONUS BONUS, FUN FACT: In 2013 the Dunkin’ Donuts CFO decided it was time to focus on beverages instead of donuts. Whoever they paid for their market projections dropped the ball of dough on that one!

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    Get Your House in Order!

    UPDATED (boldly) January 25, 2017!

    It’s been awhile since I posted and the site stats prove it! So here’s this art thing I made and put up for sale as a wooden poster. [It was a wooden poster (because all the cool kids are gluing stuff to wood now), but it ended up totally sold out, so here’s a version on traditional paper. Some might say the way the good Lord intended a poster to be.]

    WIPjenni Zazzle House PosterIt’s a retro, mock-mid-century, early-20th century-esque, vintage vibe poster that TBH, makes me laugh a lot since Delusional Donald Trump threw a hissy fit about Paul Ryan. [I haven’t been laughing so much since then.]

    In reality, aka ‘the world that doesn’t reward nutjobs and asshats with fantasy notions of being important’, the message is really just about clearing out the old crap you don’t really have a use for to make room for only the things you love and need.

    It’s also what my husband yells when the folks at Wendy’s can’t manage to put a honey mustard sauce in with the nuggets. It’s pretty funny, but I guess you have to be there.

    So yeah, that’s a poster I made and it would be sweetness if you could buy one, or several – they’re really cheap. PRINT NOT CURRENTLY AVAILABLE

    [I haven’t decided if I’ll make the original available for sale yet, but I will most likely be desperately shouting it from the rooftops if I do.]

    [Keep it REAL, kids.]

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    Just Cause! Just ‘Cause – Know the Difference

    The world really has me down lately. Down and TBH, pretty frustrated. Frustrated to the point that I’ve finally accepted pessimism as realism. *old-school sigh* But, hey, whatcha gonna do?*

    ITEMS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE ON ZAZZLE

    What I’m not gonna do is write a full post to accompany my latest art vent-ure (I combined ‘art vent’ & ‘commercial venture’ into a thing. It’s my thing and I’m going to own it like a boss! – now that I’ve explained it to you.) Imma republish the sales blurb from my Zazzle store item page. There are some good words in it, so why reinvent the wheel.*

    WIPjenni Just Cause! Just 'Cause - Know the Difference

    This is available on all sorts of stuff like coffee mugs because the t-shirts aren’t selling. :)


    INCOMING BLURB!

    Current events, oh, how you vex me! Between Delusional Donald running for US president and the UK voting on things they literally don’t know the meaning of, I’ve run out of patience with stupidity and the self-defensive, holier-than-thou aggression displayed to cover it. Since it’s impossible to force folks to read a dictionary, help out your fellow humans by providing a quick lesson via your own dress sense!

    Ladies, get all sorts of attention as people read your chest!* Gentlemen, look intellectual and snarky at the same time!** Non-ladies & non-gentlemen, buy this design on whatever attracts the ‘right’ crowd! Chock full of ALL the graphical gimmicks, you’re sure to impress your friends and everyone who sees your snazzy WIPjenni gear!

    *And make a clever, political statement too! **Embrace your hipsterness – who knows how long it’s gonna last!

    OUTGOING BLURB! (?)

    Some Nights by Fun has been playing in my head all day. Probably because “some days” has been going through my mind and I can’t think of any songs with that title. :)

    *I don’t know when or if to use question marks (AKA “goinks”) on rhetorical questions, so I decide on-the-fly, based on my mental inflection.

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    When a problem comes along, you must WIP it. WIP it good.

    Leading with a 36 year-old, new wave song, you know it’s going to be a good post! OK, maybe not the best post ever, but the lyrics still stand as viable advice.

    NO LONGER AVAILABLE ON ZAZZLE

    Over the past few weeks there has been some adversity to overcome in the land of WIP, and after some soul-searching, a little stream-of-consciousness-profanity-prose and no small amount of coffee, the thoroughly modern panacea popped up: “MAKE A RETRO STYLE GRAPHIC T-SHIRT!” said my mind. So I listened. I banged out a mildly sarcastic little number that actually has a pretty nifty passive-aggressive vibe for anyone who makes an effort to do ‘the right thing’ and occasionally (or far, far, more often) has to walk away from an opportunity due to someone else’s wrong thing. It’s also a fun shirt if you happen to be one of those people who tends to document everything with images and words, and, oh, I don’t know, A FUNCTIONING, FACTUAL MEMORY! So yeah, it looks good too. Also available in white – for those times between Easter and Labor Day! :)

    I'm recording this conversation. t shirt
    I'm recording this conversation. t shirt by WIPjenni

    Follow me on Instagram and Twitter – comment with #wipjenni. Tell your friends and family! You are a star and I want to be just like you when I grow up.